


All My Demons Greeting Me As Friends

by orphan_account



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fae, F/M, Fae Magic, Inspired by Music, Kissing, Knives, Paganism, Rey Needs A Hug, Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 20:34:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12992007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The Fae King let her pass.He is usually not so kind.





	1. RUNAWAY

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kylocatqueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kylocatqueen/gifts).



Creatures of the wood are things that you do not often see, especially if you’re mortal. You needed a silver ring, or some sort of offering to be blessed with their presence. Rey was eight when she first saw him, the fae king. He was dark, clothed in a cloak of raven feathers. He looked at her with red eyes, “I don’t have anything to offer you.” She tells the fae king. “I am nothing but a mere peasant girl, with no family.”

    He stands taller than her, but when he took of his cloak, that dark aura around him falls away, and he looks like nothing but a teenage boy. Rey remembers the stories of murder, that the fae king would kill in order to take sacrifices. He knelt, fishing something from his raven cloak, and handed it to Rey. A loaf of bread. “Eat it sparingly,” He said. “It’s enchanted to bring you luck.”

    Rey takes the bread gingerly from the Fae King-Boy. “What is this for?”

    “Your pain, I do not take from people in pain.”

    “And what do I have to pay for such kindness?” She asks.

    He looks at her strangely for a second, then says, “One year. Meet me here.” Rey nodded, and she was on her way, heading back through the trees back to her village. The woods was a place that she no longer feared after that.

    She ate the bread the fae king and felt full for the first time in a while.

    She slept in a log cabin with eight other orphans, and worked on fixing traps in the day.

    It was a monotonous circle of life. Cold and starving, and often underfed, but every day after she ate the bread of the Fae King, sparingly like he encouraged her to, she had felt a little less pained. A little less lonely.

    The other kids had noticed it to, but no one would ever say anything about it, for fear of angering the girl. Rey was a bit of an outsider to all the other nameless children, she had told stories of surviving the fae king when she had come back and they called her a witch, saying that she should be burned at the stake.

    Most of the times, now they said not a word to her, and that was okay with her. She wasn’t much for conversation anyways. Rey had always found herself to be a girl that was mostly occupied by her mind. Her mind was the placed she escaped to when awful things happened. It’s where she would escape when her parents died, it’s where she would escape now.

    She was checking a rabbit trap out by the edge of the woods when a rock was thrown at her. A tall girl, muscular and towering about the rest of the kids looked at her with a malicious look on her face. Rey looked down, to see blood inking the perfect white snow around her trap, and she ran.

    She ran as far as she could, feeling lightheaded all the meantime.

    She ran the whole way back to the spot in which she had met the Fae King, making sure that no one was following her.

    For the night she stayed there, and she cried.

    She cried harder than she had before, and she was sure for once that she was going to die. It was cold, and she had nothing but a mere dress and shaw on.

    That’s when the Fae King came in his raven cloak, he held a large staff with a dark aura emitted from it, but in that one instance, it emitted a soft light that comforted Rey in that moment.

    “You summoned me,” He said.

    “I did not,” She said.

    “You came here on purpose, did you not, orphan child?”

    “I did.” She said.

    “You cried upon my soil, so what is wrong?” That’s when he noticed the bit of blood dripping down her neck from the back of her head. “I see,” He says. “That looks like it hurts.” Rey sniffed and the Fae King disappeared for a second, appearing in front of her seconds later. She nearly jumped out of her skin. “Don’t be afraid.” He told her. He held out an ointment that glowed like the stars did in the night sky, bending over and dipping a finger in it. He gestured for her to come forward, and he applied it over the wound on her hand.

    Rey had never felt such a cooling relief in her life. When she reached back to where the wound had been, it was no longer there. She looked back at him in awe. “How do I thank you for your kindness?” She asks.

    “Grace me with your presence once more, in a years time.” He says. She nods. It’s a small price to pray for the kindness he’s given her.

    The Fae King’s eyes darken for a second, “And Rey,”

    _How did he know her name?_

    “Yes,” She answered, swallowing hard.

    “Take this,” He reaches out a gloved hand, holding a necklace Rey was sure some rich woman offered up in return for safe passage through the woods.

    “What for?”

    “If anyone hurts you again, it will aid you in retaliation.” He disappears. She goes. Rey promised yet again, that she would come on the same day, on the same time that she met him that first year, and she kept her promise. It was clear, as Rey grew older, that the Fae King was like any other lonely boy in this world. He wanted someone to take his mind off of responsibility, someone that would ease his woes without him having to actually address them.

So she did what she could, she would play games with him, dance, and they would both ignore their problems for years. This went on for seven years.

When Rey turned fifteen, he wasn’t there. 

She waited all day for him, but he never came. 

 


	2. CONQUEROR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I've been looking for a conqueror, but you don't seem to come my way..."

He watched her that day, watched her look around in confusion, she looked through the shadows, looking for her friend. How he wished to go to her, but he couldn’t. A king has more to focus on than a human. At the moment, he was dealing with a clan of goblins that needed his most immediate attention. 

Still, he couldn’t help but feel guilty as he watched her through his mirror, she stayed the whole night in the same spot that they always met.

* * *

 

It had been another year, and he wasn’t here again. Rey was beginning to get fed up, this time she didn’t stay the whole night like she had before. She had packed various breads and a few other snacks for herself, so she roamed the forest. The leaves were a greenish blue color, the light trickling down in a wave of colors. 

Rey sighed, grumbling about the promise he had made her keep. Rey had kept her promise. She had come to the same spot that he told her to come each year. 

She walked near the side of a lake, methodically putting one foot in front of the other. “You seem distressed,” Rey nearly jumped out of her skin. She turned, hoping that the Fae King was behind her. 

Alas, it wasn’t him. It was another boy, about her age. He wore a cape of black fur, a sword, sheathed in dark leather under the cape. “Who are you?” Rey asked. 

“Finn,” He replied, “now calm down. I’m not here to hurt you.” Rey eased a little. The boy’s eyes were a deep gold color. 

“You’re a lycanthrope,” Rey said aloud. 

“Yes, good guess.” The boy seemed uneasy, but he walked forward to her. “Like I said, I’m not going to hurt you. I just saw that you had food and—” Finn swallowed. 

“Don’t be ashamed for asking.” She told him, fishing a roll out of her basket. She threw it to him and he caught it. “I don’t have much though, sorry.” He nodded gratefully, was going to turn to go and then came back and started walking beside her. 

“What are you doing?” She asked. 

“You looked lonely,” 

“You look lonely. Where’s the rest of your pack?” He looked down at the ground as they walked along the beach. Rey knew that she hit a touchy subject. She was about to tell him to forget about that when he said, 

“I left.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry.” 

“No, it’s okay. I wanted to leave.” 

“Aren’t wolves supposed to stay together though?” 

“Yes, they are. But there was some things I didn’t agree with regarding how things were done.” Rey nodded. That was understandable. 

“Well if you want someone to stay with, I can stay with you.” He looked almost flattered for a second. 

“Really?” 

“Really, I don’t have anyone either.” 

“You were talking about someone,” 

“A friend.” She said. “We meet once in these woods each year, but he’s broken his promise two years in a row. I’m tired of waiting,” 

“Whoever this friend is, he’s missing out on a lot.”

* * *

 

Perhaps he should go and visit her, he thinks to himself as he watches her walk along the beach. It’s the lycanth that sends a shiver of jealousy through him, watching how she began talking to him so easily makes him think of the times in the woods when they first met. 

She had been nothing but a girl, and still, she’d managed to become his world. 

_ Soon,  _ Kylo thought to himself. They had won the war against the goblin clan and he might be afforded some free time soon. 

The question was,  _ would she want to see him? _

* * *

 

That night she did not go to her village, she made a fire and Finn and her ate. He seemed surprised that she was so comfortable around him. The moon was coming up, and by this time Rey realized that most people would be running away. 

She wasn’t afraid of him though. 

He didn’t change. It wasn’t a full moon after all. 

“So,” He asked after some time. “Who is your friend?” 

“My friend?” She asks. 

He nods. 

“The Fae King,” She said. 

“What?” The boy seemed to tense. Rey wondered if she said something wrong. 

“The Fae King,” She said again, “he’s always been very nice to me.” Finn got up, and was starting to leave. Rey chased him. “Hey! Where are you going?”

“I would rather not get in the sights of such a malevolent creature,” 

“What?” 

“Fae and lycanthrope do not have a good track record.” 

“That doesn’t tell me why you leave.” 

Finn had a look of fear in his eyes, but the fear turns to sympathy as he stares at her. “I lied about my pack earlier,” 

“Okay,” 

“The Fae King killed them all. I’m the only one left.” A strange taste developed in Rey’s mouth.  _ Is this why he had not visited her?  _

Something shifted in the shadows behind her, and she turned. She saw his eyes, glowing like hot coals in the dark. 

“I’m flattered I’ve been mentioned,” His voice is low and snarky. “But I believe it’s time for you to leave, lycanth.”

He was going to, but before he could Rey grabbed his sword, forcibly unsheathing it from its scabbard. She makes a jab towards him, and he recoils. “I think it’s time for you to leave.” She snarled. There were tears in her eyes, stinging her cheeks. 

He looks down at her, something strange in his eyes. “Are you sure you know how to wield that, child?” 

“I am not a child,” She snarled, “and I am no longer your friend.” 

“You don’t know the full story,” 

“There’s no excuse for murder, you monster.” 

He looked down at her, the light from Rey and Finn’s fire shining on his face. “Fine, child.” He says. “I will go, but don’t expect gifts from me anymore.” With that, he leaves.

* * *

 

She doesn’t see him cry.

 

In fact, no one has ever seen him cry. He is alone when he does, within his throne room. His head in his hands.

Many people had raised their swords to him before, challenged him, he had never been affected by it before. So why now? He asks himself. 

Why now? 

She was his friend. 

His only friend. 


	3. RUNNING WITH THE WOLVES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She runs, and runs, and runs.  
> She wants to feel free.  
> She hadn't yet.

 

Rey lived in the woods now, with Finn. She had witnessed his changing once. How scared he was, not for himself but for her. 

She'd climbed the nearest tree and stayed there the whole night. He was there, slumped over in the morning. She'd gone down the tree and inspected his wounds, there were a few scratches here and there but nothing major. She tended to them before he woke. 

When he woke, he grabbed her suddenly. “Are you okay? I didn't hurt you did I?” 

“No.” She insisted. “Now come, let me make you something to eat.”

She had caught a rabbit and cooked it. She gave it all to him, but he was still hungry. Rey insisted that he rest. 

She went out. 

She decided to check some traps that she had by the river, see if she’d caught any fish. She’s eighteen now, and sees him by the water, his shirt off. For a second she doesn’t know what to do, she doesn’t know if she should run or if she should stay hidden or if she should talk to him. It had been so long since they talked but at the same time, could she ever forgive him? 

“I know you’re there.” He said. Rey decided to come out for the trees and began to walk out towards the water. He was about to walk towards her but he recoiled. “You have iron on you.” 

She didn’t say a thing as she began to check her traps, satisfied with the number of salmon that she had caught. Ten, to be exact. She began walking back to Finn as he got recovered, and threw his cloak of ravens around her. “Rey,” He said, she turned, violently. 

“Do not follow me around, Fae. I do not want your presents and I will not give you anything, so you have no use in visiting me.” She was about to leave when she heard him mutter under his breath, 

“I missed you.” 

Rey couldn’t help him, she turned on him again, and only said three words. These three words were enough to tear through him. “You’re a monster.”

* * *

 

He goes back into the shadows for the next year and a half, he watches as Rey has adventures with Finn and clears the woods of thieves and pickpocketing pixies. It was when the winter came that sadness struck. 

Kylo watched her, distracted, as she and Finn ran straight into another pack of lycanth. 

He knew how this would end, and he was ready, large ebony staff he’d stolen from a warlock in hand. 

This was not going to be good.

* * *

 

Rey and Finn had found another pack. Rey thought that she would be happier for him, she knew she should be.

But she was scared, really scared. Especially now that she was bleeding near a pack of very large, werewolves. She couldn’t remember much, but she remembered Finn staring at her, with tears in his eyes as she collapsed to the ground. Everything was hasy, and she felt cold and numb. 

A blizzard was beginning to pick up. “I’m sorry,” The boy said. “I really am.” 

And with that he left. 


	4. LUCKY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You've changed, Fae King. Why?"

Rey woke up in a place that she did not recognise. It was dark, save for a light that was emanating mysteriously from nothing, in the middle of the  ceiling. She was sat in a ivory chair, that she noticed was almost throne-like. She looked around, and her blood went cold. He was kneeling on the floor in front of her, head bowed. “Where am I?” She asked. 

“You’re my guest.” he answered.  _ Leave it up to the Fae King to make things as vague as possible.  _

**“** And what of my friend?” 

“You mean the traitor who left you out in the cold?” Rey froze. He saw what happened. Rey could barely even remember what happened herself. “You’ll be happy to know I have no idea where he is.” 

“You’re one to talk about abandonment,” Rey hissed. That stung him, and stung hard. She could see it on her former friend’s face. He got up, now only a few inches from her face. 

“Is that how you speak to the man who saved your life??” She saw him wince a little as he moved away from her. He was hurt, physically. But Rey didn’t mention it to him. Rey tried to get up from her seat. The Fae King shoved her back down and she cried out an obscenity. “There’s no point in trying to leave, it’s so cold out there that even a Fae would die in a matter of minutes.” Rey did not doubt him when he said that. 

“Fine.” She conceded. “But what am I to do until then?” It was clear that that was something he hadn’t thought through very clearly. 

“What do mortals find as entertainment?” Rey’s stomach twisted in knots as she stared at the Fae King. For a slight moment he was the boy she had made friends with so long ago.

“We like stories,” She offered weakly. “Adventure, poetry, and music…” 

The Fae King nodded. “I will have some things for you within the hour.” He promised. And with that he left.

* * *

This time he kept his promise. Kylo knew that Rey didn’t want to see him again, but fate had other plans for the two of them. Now Kylo brought her stories his mother used to read him as a child, and a music box that played whatever song the user wished. He set them on the floor of her room and was going to leave again when Rey asked, “Where are you going?” 

“To the throne room, to see if I’m needed.” To his surprise, Rey looked disappointed when he said that. Kylo turned towards the door and then asked, “Do you want me to come back?” 

“Yes,” 

“I’ll come back in three hours time,” A low rumble from Rey’s stomach interrupted them and Kylo had to keep himself from laughing. “I’ll come back with some food.” 

* * *

He was on time again.Three hours later and a seasoned bread loaf in his hands. Rey felt a bit pathetic, her mouth was watering just looking at the food in front of her. He gave her the bread first. “Eat slow,” he insisted. 

She did. She took the pudding next. Rey knew he was staring at her as she ate. 

It was a little more than uncomfortable. 

Perhaps he was just wanted to say something, Rey thought to herself. She finished her meal, feeling a lot better than she previously had. “Was it good?” His voice was so soft, it was almost as if he was speaking to a wounded animal. 

Rey wanted to make sure that he knew that she wasn’t that. “It was,” She met his knew that she wasn’t that. She met his eye and he looked down on the floor. “I’m leaving as soon as the snow clears out.” 

He seemed disappointed by that. “Right. I expected nothing less.” He had no right to be sad. He was the one who abandoned her for two years, and then killed a whole pack of innocent lycanthrope. 

Two years. 

Two long years where she missed having someone to talk to. She couldn’t forgive him for that. Rey looked up. He was still there, and she didn’t know why. 

Fae were different that humans, they had different social customs that might have been unbeknownst to Rey. “How do I apologise?” He finally asked.

“You don’t.” She replied cooly. 

His red eyes burned, Rey watched as tears threatened to escape his eyes and splash onto his cheeks. He left before she could see if he actually cried or not. 

* * *

She thought it had been two years. Well, it had been - technically two years- for her. Yet in the faerie realm, time passed far faster than it did for the mortal realm. 

_ She wouldn’t understand,  _ he thought to himself,  _ She either wouldn’t  believe him or would believe that he was trying to minimise her own sorrows, which he certainly was not trying to do.   _ So he forgot about it for the moment, wandering around his palace aimlessly. Of course, Rey was the only person on his mind. The question was, how would he make things up to her?


	5. Winter Bird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "All I need is to remember what it's like to feel alive."

Rey woke up with a blanket over her. There was a cloak and a lantern next to her as well. Of course, the cloak was made of raven feathers. _Was he trying to brand her?_ Rey thought to herself. Her question was answered when he said, “It’s the warmest cloak I had that would fit you. Nothing more than that.”

“I thought you said you were going to stop giving me things,” Rey fastened the cloak above her shoulders as the Fae King watched her. _Was he there all night?_

“I was angry when I said that.” He said. “I'm not now.”

“Right, because you were totally justified in being angry at me not liking the fact that you killed a whole pack of innocent lycanthrope.”

“I didn't say my being angry was rational,” he stepped out of the shadows. “Now I assumed that you would not want to stay pent up in your room the entire time, would you like to come with me?” Rey looked back at him. An outstretched hand was trembling before her, gloved in leather. Then he took his glove off. “Please?” Rey couldn't help it. She took his hand. He lead her through a back way she hadn't seen before. There was an ebony staircase that went up, up, and up.

Rey didn't know how long they had been walking up it, all she knew was she was glad that he’d given her that cape. It was getting colder by the minute.

They ended up on a bridge covered in frost and snow. The ceiling was covered in icicles that dripped every once and a while, the sound of water hitting the ground somewhere below them creating some sort of music that Rey had never appreciated before. Rey wasn't watching. She nearly slipped. Kylo caught her without batting an eyelash. “Watch your step,” he said gruffly. He righted her, and they kept walking.

That's when Rey heard it. “Are those birds?” She asked.

That would be impossible. All the birds had migrated south. “Yes,” Kylo smiled a little and then said. “Come on. I'll show you them if you'd like.”

“I’d like that a lot,” Rey admitted. She had to say that he was trying, she got that, and she appreciated it. There was another part of her that was sounding off warning tolls, telling her that she needed to leave as soon as possible though. She took his hand once more as he helped her down the bridge and towards a snowy path with trees that looked like they were made of ice as well. Rey didn’t bother questioning it all, the magics of the Fae world were something that she would never completely understand.

Kylo pointed his staff at one of the trees, and Rey looked up. Four crystalline birds sat there chirping, singing their songs.

She gasped in awe at their presence. “They’re made of ice.”

“Yes,” He says, “They are. A rarity that you don’t see much, even in the Fae world. I personally own four of the last twelve of them left in the world. They’re meant to bring good luck to anyone who hears their song,” One of the birds landed on staff. He held his hand up gently, letting the bird hop off of the ebony staff and onto his pale skin. “Hold up your hand,” He told her. “Keep it still,” Rey watched as the bird hopped onto her hand.

It wasn’t as cold as she thought it would be, it’s small feet tickling her hand as it stared at her. Then it chirped again, and Rey laughed. “I think it likes you,”  The bird flies off and the two of them are left in the snow. “Of course, I don’t know who wouldn’t.” Rey looked up at him, raising an eyebrow. “Like you, of course. I don’t know why anyone wouldn’t like you.”

“King,”

“Kylo,”

“Kylo.”

“Ben, if you absolutely want to.”

“Why?”

“I want you to trust me, again.” Rey started walking up the snowy path to the small frozen over patches of water right under the bridge.  “Rey,” He grabbed her by the hand, gently. She turned around, jerking her hand away from his.

“You make it sound like it’s easy.” she said. “It really isn’t easy to trust someone,” Then she looked down, “I’m not sure if I can trust you, Ben.” He swallowed and swallowed hard.

“When the snow clears out, if you want, I could help you find your friend.” He says. “I’ll do whatever you want me to.” Rey backed up when he got closer to her. “I mean it. Whatever you want me to do to earn your favor back, just tell me what to do.” Kylo loomed over her, making Rey have to look up at him as he pleaded.

“Ben,” She said again. “I forgive you,” It was like someone had just lifted a large weight off of his shoulders. Without warning, she hugged him. “It will take a while for me to trust you again, fully I mean. It’ll take a while to go back to normal, but I forgive you. Now can we go? My boots are starting to soak through.”

 

* * *

 

 

He’d put her in front of a fire, and put her boots up too. He was tired, more tired than he had ever been in his entire life. Maybe he was finally letting himself feel again, Kylo wasn’t sure. Rey was calling him Ben now, a name that only his mother knew. 

“Ben,” She sniffed. He wondered if the cold was making her sick. 

“Yes?” 

“There’s something you’ve been wanting to tell me, for awhile. I can tell? What is it?” That took him aback. 

“What?” 

“You heard me,” She reached out to him, motioning for him to take her hand and sit down beside her in front of the fire. “You want to tell me something, now is better a time than ever to tell me.” If there was a good time to tell her, she was right, it would be now. But he didn’t want to kill the mood. It had been so long since he had seen that smile on her face and he had intended to keep it for as long as he possibly could. 

“It’s nothing,” He told her. 

“Is it about what you did?” She asked after a moment of silence. 

“What? No, no. It’s not that,” How was he supposed to tell her? Would she even believe him? “It’s just… everything in the Fae World is different, you know? From the human world. We live forever, technically. As long as we’re not killed by iron, we live forever. We’re less compassionate, or supposed to be less compassionate than humans, and time passes differently.” Rey’s breath caught. “When I was visiting you, we were on the brink of war with a clan of Goblins. I was appointed King after my mother had grown sick. The last year I visited you, she died.” 

“I didn’t know,” 

“It’s okay? How could you have known? I made a point to not visit you. Anyways, my mother died, and the Goblin clan we were fighting, they declared war on us for the hell of it. I think. It was a twenty year war that we just came out of. We won.” 

“Wait, twenty years?” 

“Yes, Rey. Twenty years.” 

She was silent for a while before she pulled at him again, wrapping him into a hug. For a second he just sat there. But then he closed his eyes, and put his arms around her, resting his head in the crook of her neck. It wasn’t long before he started crying again. “Don’t worry,” She said. “You won’t be alone again,” 


	6. I Went Too Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jealousy gets the best of us.

That night, Kylo had kept her near. Who was to blame him? He had been denied her for the longest time, and Rey didn’t seem to mind offering up her personal space to him, he was warm, and because of that she fell asleep on him soon. 

That morning he was greeted with a smile from her, and she pushed herself off of him. “Hello,” she whispered. 

“Hi,” he swallowed, and swallowed hard. He forgot just how  _ perfect  _ this mortal was sometimes, and seeing her wake up under the firelight only made her look even prettier. “How are you fairing?”

“I’m fairing fine,” She said. “You?” 

“Better than I have been,” He admitted. The both of them got up and Kylo left her with books and some food, telling her that he would be there in about an hour to accompany her somewhere else in that kingdom. And oh, how slow that hour seemed to go by. When he was there to collect Rey, she was waiting, and oh how good it was for her to come to him with such a cheery disposition. 

“Hello, your majesty.” she giggled. “I trust your rule is going well.” Rey took his hand, awfully close to him compared to usual. 

“It is,” He said. “Are you ready to stretch your legs?” 

Rey nodded and he pulled her gently along with him. There were so many places in the palace that only he knew about. So many places that he wanted to share with her. “I figured that you’ve seen enough of the snow, it’s cold and wet and unpleasant, and I read somewhere that you mortals could get sick if you’re in it for too long,” 

Rey nodded, “That is correct, where are you taking me?” 

Kylo stopped and loomed over her for just a second. Her lips were soft, and pink, and Kylo felt that if he kissed her they might taste sweeter than he imagined. “It’s a surprise,” He breathed heavily. “It would lose it’s magic if I just outright told you.” 

“Okay, then.” He noticed that Rey flushed almost as pink as her lips. He would have to ask her what that was about later. Right now he focused on taking her from the confines of her room. Kylo could feel himself spiralling, thinking about her like this. His mind narrowed to only thoughts of pleasing her. Who could blame him though? She was his only friend, one he’d been denied the pleasure of seeing for twenty long and hard years. Twenty years that he was trying very, very, hard to forget. 

When they stopped they stopped in front of a door covered in vine. Kylo turned to Rey and said, “Before we enter, you must do one thing.” 

“Okay,” She seemed wary of his tone, but still listened nonetheless. 

“Think of the one place you want to go the most, think of all your desires, and nothing less.” With that, he opened the door to the room. He blocked his own desires from his mind and let Rey take over. It was very quick, the way her thoughts formed around them. 

It was almost like watching a paintbrush form the scenery around them. 

An island. Kylo realised they were on an island. Rey was barefoot in the sand, sea foam tickling her toes, Kylo looked all around them. Felt the wind blowing through his hair, the wet sand squelched under his sandals. Then he saw it. Saw them rather. Two girls, rather young looking, lithe and pale, and when they looked his way they smiled. One had raven black curly hair like his, and the other had brown hair more like Rey’s. They both had red eyes. 

Kylo’s breath caught as he looked to Rey, hoping to god that she’d noticed them. She seemed too caught up in the world around them to see what Kylo saw though.  _ Was this really her thoughts?  _ He was asking himself.  _ Or was this some desire of his seeping out into her, corrupting the world that she desired?  _ Kylo was going to point them out to Rey, but he couldn’t open his mouth, the imaginary girls had come up to him, each one hugging him at the base of his legs. 

They didn’t speak, but they didn’t have to. “Ben?” Rey turned to him and suddenly the scene around them flickered, and they were somewhere else, it was up south, in a clear field. Wolves were all around them. There was one that was still a man. 

Him. 

The traitor. 

His mood soured. “Finn,” Rey’s breath caught as she watched him. He was sitting in the grass, near a fire, silent. She walked forwards, her hands shaking as she called his name again. 

“He can’t hear you,” Kylo said. Everything dissipated and Rey turned towards him. After everything, she still wanted the traitor more than him… 

“When is the snow going to clear up?”

That’s when his heart broke, and he left Rey in the room, slamming the door behind him as he fled and started walking down the stairs. 

He prayed Rey wouldn’t follow him, of course, she did. “Hey!” She shouted. “What was that?” 

He was already almost all the way down the stairs, she was jumping a few at a time to meet the distance between the two. “Ben, I am talking to you.” 

“I know,” He hissed. They stopped at the base of the stairs. Rey was giving him that look, that look that she gave him when she wielded a sword against him what seemed like so long ago. 

“Why did you just freak out and leave like that all the sudden? That’s not okay!” 

“Because after everything, you’re still holding on!” He snarled. She nearly tripped on the stairs as she tried to back away from him. At that moment, Kylo hadn’t noticed. “After everything, I thought that you would stop thinking about him, and want to be with me for once. It’s like you’re physically here but at the same time, your mind is somewhere else, you’re half the world away.” His gloved hand caressed Rey’s face, “My Rey,” He should’ve stopped there, he should’ve realised what he was doing and apologised profusely for being so awful to her. He should’ve wiped her tears away and said that he would help her find Finn if that was truly what she wanted. 

He kissed her. It was just the lightest touch, but it was like he could see everything when they touched. Their skin touched and it was like aging winter sun, providing the weakest bits of warmth on the coldest of days. He could see the birth of spring, and new life, and warmth when he touched her, and the sweetest of summers. That sweetness was of her kiss was ruined by the salt of her tears. 

Rey was the first to break apart from him, and before he could apologise for everything, she slapped him. “I’m leaving.” She spat. She pushed past him on the stairs and went back to her room. 

By the time that Kylo reached her room, she was gone, and so was the cloak that he’d given her. 

He caught her outside. “Rey!” He called. 

“Go away!” She shouted back. 

His mind was racing, he didn’t know what to do, he couldn’t just let her leave in the cold like this… She didn’t even know where she was going. He could hear her crying, despite the howling winds and blizzard that was going down on the both of them. 

He had to get her back inside, had to get her warm. 

He didn’t care if any other Fae saw what was happening, if they saw her. He was about to grab her shoulder when she disappeared. She’d reached the veil between the human world and the Fae world, When Kylo reached through the veil, she wasn’t anywhere to be seen, and her footprints had already been snowed out. 

She was truly gone. 

He was alone again. 


	7. THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD

Rey had fled the kingdom of Fae a few days ago, and she was practically miserable. She still didn’t regret leaving. Not in the slightest. She was only miserable because of the cold. She had taken solace in a cave far away from the entrance to the Fae Kingdom, and made a fire. 

It was long enough for Rey to reflect upon everything, to remember the kiss that the Fae King had given her. It had not come unwanted. She would be lying if she had said that she hadn’t fantasized about it once or twice during her stay there, but she was smart enough to realise that the kiss he had given her was for all the wrong reasons. It wasn’t because he loved her, no it wasn’t that at all, although Rey knew that it was very possible that in his own way, he felt compassion of some sort for her, she also knew that the kiss was completely selfish and a last ditch effort for her to forget her friend and stay there with him forever. 

Rey wished that he could see that she could love both him and Finn, that she could give them both the attention they wanted. After all, Finn was  _ just _ a friend. The Fae King was the only one she’d even felt an inkling of attraction towards. 

Rey was pulled from her thoughts when someone cleared their throat. She nearly jumped out of her skin and looked up. “Hello?” She called. 

“Hi,” A voice said from the darkness. “Don’t worry I won’t hurt you… just uh… this is my cave and I was wondering what you were doing here?” A man came out from the darkness, very young and attractive looking. 

“Oh, sorry. Didn’t know that anyone lived here. It’s just…” 

“Cold,” The man finished her sentence. Rey realised that he was carrying a blanket with him, one that he draped over her shoulders before she could protest. “That’s fine.”

“Might I ask, who are you?” 

“I could ask the same.” The man laughed. “Why don’t you go first since you were practically trespassing?” 

“Hey!” Rey exclaimed. “How was I supposed to know that an attractive dude lived in the middle of jack nowhere? There was no sign of life when I entered.” The man raised his hands in defense. 

“It was just a joke,” He said. “The name’s Poe. Poe Dameron. Local apothecary and warlock hermit man.” Rey laughed at that. 

“Rey,” She said. 

“Just Rey?”

“Just Rey,” He nodded. “That’s a pretty name, it fits you. You look like some girl that would pick flowers in the spring time or something like that.” A smile played at Rey’s lips. “So, Rey. You gonna tell me why you’re wearing a Fae cloak when you’re not a Fae?” 

“It was given to me,” Rey stated. It wasn’t a lie, but Poe seemed skeptical for a second. “By the Fae King,” His eyes widened. 

“You’re the girl…” 

“What?” 

“The girl he talked about,” 

“You know the Fae King.” Poe nodded and then started to tell her more of him. 

“He was fighting the war, for the longest time, and after one time he came to me. Very injured and desperate. You were the first person he spoke of after I patched him up. Not the war or how he got injured, but you.” 

“What did he say?” 

“He said that if he didn’t survive the night, that if he was going to die, that my job would be to find a girl with chocolate brown hair and sunkissed skin, and tell her that he was sorry that he didn’t go to her.” Rey’s heart throbbed as she heard this. 

“How do I know you’re not someone he paid off to win my favor?” 

“If I was paid off I wouldn’t be living in a cave.” Poe said nonchalantly. He sat down next to the fire, letting it crackle between them. “Make no mistake, the Fae King is selfish in some ways, and ultimately awful in others. I wouldn’t be his friend unless my life depended on it. I think he’s lonely though. His loneliness makes him awful and he doesn’t know how to remedy it.” 

“What else do you know about him?” 

“He has nightmares, like a mortal, but worse. This wasn’t my original cave. It’s my second because he destroyed the first one in his sleep.” 

“And?” 

“He could be good.” Poe said, “but he doesn’t know how.” Rey nodded. She knew that too. “Anyways, would you like some apple cider? I just made some.” 

“That sounds heavenly.” Rey smiled. 

“Great.  I’ll go get some and be right back.”

* * *

 

The days that came after their fight were hard and arduous and Ben distracted himself with the stuff of rulers. He’d tried to find Rey through his mirror but couldn’t, which left him worried. He’d never been able to not see her before, but then he realised that perhaps someone was blocking him from being able to see her. Another magical source sometimes confused his mirror. 

That’s when he realised who it was. Poe Dameron. Suddenly he didn’t feel so worried about where she was. The warlock was a good man, and wouldn’t harm a hair on her body. 

He just had to figure out he could make everything up to her now.

* * *

 

Rey fell asleep after Poe had let her drink some apple cider. Her dreams were usually nothing but black, but this time it was something different. Something surrounded by green and nature. It was spring again, and she was a child. Well at least, the girl in front of her was a child. It was where she met Kylo. He was just a boy then. So innocent looking. So lonely. 

He’d scared away the monsters for her. 

Healed her. 

“Why is this memory playing?” A voice behind her said. Rey jumped and saw him looming over her. 

“You,” She hissed.    
“Me,” He rolled his eyes. “I was just trying to make certain that you weren’t dying of hypothermia, no need to give me that.” 

“I have every right to give you attitude after the things you pulled.” He was silent as he looked back upon the memory. The way Rey looked at him then was so innocent. “God, what happened to me?” He hissed. “I looked so young then.” 

“You still do,” 

“No, it’s not just that. Watch.” There was something different about the way he smiled, there was something more childlike about it. There was something more childlike and innocent about the both of them. “Age robs you of innocence, I suppose.” He said. 

He stepped closer to Rey and this time she didn’t shy away. “I’d give anything to look at things with the eyes of a child again. To not be… awful.” 

“You know not being awful requires you to actually try and uh, be nice.”

Ben winced. “I know. I know, it’s just… you don’t get it. No one in the Fae Kingdom is nice, Rey. The Fae are a cold people who like shiny things and don’t care for romance.”

“Are you like them?” 

“No,” He said. 

“Then maybe you should act like it, be a better man.” The memory disappeared and Ben was sitting in his throne room. Rey stood a few feet away from him. “If you come to me, if you help me find Finn, I will stay by your side. I just want to know that my friend is safe.” 

“What so you could choose him over me again?” 

“That is not what I did!” She hissed. “You don’t understand this but maybe I can love more than one person! People are kind and warm and there is good in all of us and we love multiple people, that’s just a fact that you’re going to have to live with Ben!” 

“You love more than one person?” He swallowed hard and Rey realised what she’d just admitted to. “Say it,”

“You. Him. I love you both.” Ben swallowed and swallowed hard. 

“Get out.” He said. 

“What?”

“Get out of my head, Rey. I need to think.”

Rey woke up. 


	8. WARRIOR

Kylo loved her, he loved her, he loved her, he loved her so much. It consumed his thoughts these days, drove him up the walls as he thought of her. Rey was still with Poe, thank god. He was keeping her safe. Still, Kylo couldn’t help but worry about her. Each day, he’d look through his mirror before he went to bed. Sometimes, she would be trekking through the snow, little white flakes crowning her hair like a crown that Mother Nature had granted her. Sometimes she would be near the fire, warming a cup of cider, sometimes she would be sleeping. She laughed, and she was well fed, and she looked less lonely. 

 

Kylo wished that he was the reason that she looked like that. 

 

He wasn’t though. 

 

He was the monster that drove her away. The Fae King must have been thinking this in his dreams because he heard Rey’s voice. “Have you not been listening to anything I’ve been telling you or are you just that stupid?” Kylo jumped. He was in a dream, definitely. Rey was at the foot of his bed. “Did I not tell you I loved you just four weeks ago?” It was nearly a month for him. He didn’t say anything. “Say something, Kylo.” 

 

“Why would you leave if you wanted me?” Her eyes softened.

 

“Because, you need to figure out what’s more important to you. Your power, your mystique, your anger, or me?” Kylo sat up more in his bed. 

 

“What makes you think that you aren’t the most important one?” 

 

“Look at your actions, Kylo.” 

 

“Tell me what to do to make it right, tell me how to not screw things up, because I don’t know how to stop messing things up between us.”

 

Rey shook her head no, “I gave you the tools for redemption, but I can’t redeem you. You have to do that yourself.” 

 

His dream ended. 

 

* * *

 

Rey giggled as she walked on a long log across a frozen river, Poe looked like he was going to have a conniption. “Hey, be careful okay? I would like to not get beheaded by Kylo.” Rey stuck her tongue out as she jumped onto solid land. 

 

“Kylo wouldn’t behead you,” She laughed. 

 

“Don’t be so sure.” Poe said darkly. 

 

“No,” Rey said, “he wouldn’t. If he ever wanted me to stay with him, he wouldn’t.” Poe looked at her warily. 

 

“Glad to know you think you two have a good relationship.” Rey was about to open her mouth to say something about him but stopped herself, instead changing the conversation entirely. “So, are you sure we’re headed the right way towards Finn?” 

 

“Yeah,” Poe replied, “the trail is strong. Just have to keep following it.” Rey nodded, her boots crunching through the snow. “We’ll find your friends, don’t worry.” 

 

“I just hope that we find him in time,” Rey sighed. “I don’t know if I can keep this up much longer.” Poe stopped in his tracks and so did Rey.

 

“You can get through this.” He said. “You will. You’re strong and you’re not gonna die on me, you got that?” Rey was a little put off by the intensity of this statement, but she nodded and they started walking again. She guessed that Poe was mostly concerned about Kylo getting pissed and killing him if something happened to her. 

 

* * *

 

These days, Kylo hated the throne. He stayed on it as little as possible, did the bare minimums at political meetings and let his subordinates take care of the things that he didn’t have to take care of him. There was anxiety bubbling in his chest every second that he didn’t know what was happening to Rey. 

 

The woods were dangerous, and it was so easy for mortals to get hurt in the woods. After five days more, he left things to Mitaka, saying that he would be out for a while. Then he left the veil of the Fae. 

 

He knew his way towards Rey. 

* * *

 

Rey was tired by the time that they had retired to another cave. It was lucky of her really, that Poe was so good at finding caves to shield them from the cold. He let Rey go to sleep first, and she wrapped herself up in an animal fur. Drifting away slowly. 

 

“Rey,” She was surprisingly okay with hearing his voice in her dreams. It was the next best thing to having him here by her side. “Rey, can you hear me?” 

 

“Yes,” She sighed. “What do you want?” 

 

“To hear your voice.” It’s dark, wherever he is. She can’t see him and she assumes that he can’t see her. Rey wonders where he is, because it clearly isn’t the castle. “Your voice is all that I need right now.” For a second, Rey considers staying silent just to spite him. 

 

She ends up talking. “You sound lonely,” 

 

“Always have been lonely,” He replied. 

 

“More lonely than usual. Like, the kind of lonely where you know you have no one else.” There’s a moment of silence, and this confirms Rey’s suspicions about his wellbeing. 

 

“Do I have you?” 

 

“Yes,” She says without hesitation. “You always have and you always will.” 

 

Ben is silent for a minute, and then says, “I’m coming to help you find him, I’m going to make things up to you. I promise I will.” With that, she woke up from her dream. Something in her felt warmer, lighter.  _ She believed that he would, she believed it wholeheartedly.  _

 

She would find Finn. 

 

She would be with Kylo. 

 

Everything was going to be okay.


End file.
